God & Divorce

The three amigos this year!

If you want to know what the Bible says about divorce, ask a divorced person. I know because I am one, and I have those scriptures memorized.

“I will be with you wherever you go.” I would cry out to God time and time again asking him what I should do, and that’s what He would whisper.

For eighteen months I lived in absolute hell

It was always one step forward and a hundred steps back. Thirty pounds lost, multiple counselors attempts, and all the while, two small children caught in the crossfire. My greatest fear was not financial instability or even loneliness.

What scared me the most about getting divorced was going against God’s will because you see, I was raised that way.

A legalistic upbringing of a God more concerned with sin will send you into a prison, and that’s exactly what my life felt like. I was so afraid of God and his potential disappointment if I decided to leave. So I hung on to that awful marriage for way too long, and I resented being stuck between a rock and a hard place. If I stayed in this toxic relationship, I knew I would die on the inside, and if I left, I’d be bound to a lifetime of guilt. 

We tend to look at life as a series of choices. Which will you pick? Door one or door two? Which is the right door? You better choose wisely cause it’s a test! (Insert eye roll and angry emoji here!) Because that’s all a lie. In my thirty six years of life what I have found to be true is that God is behind every single door. Every. Single. One. There is no door you can open that He will not be there with you.

“God is not absent in the dark. God is everywhere in the dark.” – The Reverend Victoria Robb Powers

“I will be with you wherever you go.” Those were the words I so desperately needed to here. No matter where you are, no matter where you have been, and no matter what you do, I will be there. Divorce can be hell. And some of us feel like we made our bed and so we must sleep in it. That’s what guilt and shame do. They tell you that you deserve all the heartache. But that’s not what God says.

In Psalm 139, David is asking God where he can go to escape God’s Spirit. He then describes all of the metaphorical places we could try to run from God, but can’t.

 7 Where could I go to get away from your spirit?
    Where could I go to escape your presence?
8 If I went up to heaven, you would be there.
    If I went down to the grave, you would be there too!
9 If I could fly on the wings of dawn,
    stopping to rest only on the far side of the ocean—
10 even there your hand would guide me;
        even there your strong hand would hold me tight! (Psalm 139:7-10)

In the song, Amazing Grace, we sing about being blind and now having sight. I used to think that was about the blind people Jesus healed in the Bible. Now I think it means I didn’t “see” God, but now I do. He was, is, and will always be, with us.

If you’re in the midst of divorce, or any one of life’s dark moments, look away from your despair, your guilt, your shame and see that God has never left you. You can’t escape His presence. Nothing can separate you from His love. And that includes divorce.

I’ve been divorced for almost three years now and God is still with me. He sits at my table just like he did when there were four of us around it. God never left and He never will. No matter what. And that’s something I can hang on to.

When I’m painfully lonely, when the future is unknown and unsettling, when guilt tries to consume me, and when I make bad choices, God is with me. No matter how long you’ve been divorced, whether it’s day one or you’re decades in, that truth remains. It doesn’t matter what the reason for the divorce was, or who is to blame. God is still with you. Always.

“Fear is looking into the future and forgetting God will be there.”


  1. Kristi says:

    This is so powerful Susie. I can relate to every single word. Thanks for your powerful words and reminding us that God never gives up on us no matter what. Love you girl!

  2. I love your heart, beautiful friend. Thank you for being brave and sharing this. You are SUCH a treasure.

  3. Sonja says:

    God is already using your past as part of your future! So many need to hear these words Susie. My biggest goal is to share HOPE. You’ve done that so well here. The whole world needs to know there is always hope, cuz we have a GOD who loves us always, no matter what. 👏👏👏👏👏

  4. Kim Ward says:

    As a woman that has been divorced for 10 years wondering and praying if God would ever trust me enough to get married again, I completely understand the feeling of guilt and shame. I can honestly say God has taught me a lot over these years – some lessons not so fun. But He loves me and He is good all of the time. Thank you for your post. We all are so blessed to have a Heavenly Daddy that loves us so much!

  5. Sarah Campbell says:

    Our stories sound so similar. My grandparents and parents are still married, and I was in the Bible daily reading different versions on what God said about divorce. I am a teacher so financially I knew it would be a struggle but my main concern what what does God say? Will I be forgiven? Do I deserve to be happy? Is this a marriage I want to model for my boys?
    God sent the right people to me at the right time. I am forgiven and Jesus still loves me.
    Thank you for writing this. It’s what so many women need to hear.

  6. Laureen says:

    You are truly a blessing to all that have met you. Whether it person or online you are inspiring. Thank you for sharing your strengths, weaknesses and faith.

  7. Tara says:

    This spoke to my heart so clearly. Your reminder that God is with us, ALWAYS, is something I remind myself on the daily, especially in those crazy, messy, and not so happy times. Thank you for sharing your heart so openly!

  8. Olga says:

    Susie, you are wise beyond your years! I plan to share this with a few women that I think would benefit from reading your encouragement and wisdom. Thank you for your transparency and for sharing your heart so others can heal. xoxo

  9. Diane says:

    So good!! God is using you in some powerful ways!!

  10. Susie M says:

    Susie I went thru the same thing when I left my husband 40 years ago. I carried guilt around for years & my faith is what got me thru. I should have left earlier & stayed another 2 miserable yrs for the same reason u did. I finally turned to god, took my 2 babies & went to my parents home. I felt like a failure & felt like my parents my family were disappointed. That was just me feeling guilty. Today I have bn blessed with a wonderful family & husband.

  11. So many people need to read your message of God’s steadfast & redemptive love toward us even in the midst of divorce. I applaud your courage & transparency. Your blog is beautiful!

  12. Vicki says:

    I lived with guilt for along time I can relate
    to this. It’s a comfort to read this and know I’m
    not the only one

  13. Alicia says:

    Such a beautiful post, Susie! Thank you for sharing your heart! Your truth is sure to touch many! God is with us in everything we do. Last year was tough for me, but God got me through it, as He does with everything! I had a sign made to serve as a reminder too! Continued blessings, my friend!

  14. God is behind every door!! Ah! You just changed my life! Love this..and you!

  15. Jennie says:

    Ppl say I bring such light to the world. I’’m silly as hell, fun loving, no filter…just a catalyst for fun and happiness. But what most don’t know is my inside hurts. I should get divorced, because of my lack of love but don’t because of shame, hurting someone else, taring up my family, just every reason you could think of. Thanks for letting me vent. What I do Know is I can’t Do it on my own 🙏

  16. Littlems.magnolia says:

    Oh thank you, friend. Yes, God is behind every last door. I am 18 months in and have felt His presence right beside me. And while it doesn’t make things easy, it makes things more peaceful and bearable. I know that He has good for me. I am working on the forgiveness part. Myself and him. Thanks you for sharing the raw and hard so vulnerably. Divorce is dark and sad and lonely, but God is in it with us and is for us.

  17. Sarah says:

    Such a beautiful post!! God is so good!!! I’m so proud of you and all you have conquered!!! Cannot wait to see what all you do!!

  18. Elizabeth Siu says:

    Thank you !!
    I carried guilt around for 18 years now.
    I divorced my ex when our twins were 16 years , my marriage was over when they were 2 years I stayed in the marriage for the kids until I couldn’t take it anymore .
    he got sick with cancer it was horrible to see him suffer the way he did then my guilt got worse , he died 2 years a go my daughter blames me for his dead because I was not there to take care of him !
    When I read “God is behind every door “ something inside me felt right .
    You have no idea how sharing your heart with us has made a difference in our daily life.
    Thank you very much.

    • Susie Robb says:

      Oh, friend. I am so sorry to hear of all the heart ache you have experienced. Know too that God is close to the broken hearted. Thank you for your comment and for reading my story. I’ll be praying for you. Much love!

  19. Amanda says:

    Thank you for these words! Going through it, it’s definitely hard, ugly, paralyzing, and terrible. However, along the way I’ve seen God show up in big and little ways, reminding me that he’s here. I appreciate your honesty and bravery to share your story so that it can help others!

  20. Karen says:

    I can’t help but totally dislike your ex-husband. Did he ever apologize to you or to the kids? I can’t imagine what you went through I just know there’s someone else out there for you and all God’s timing!!

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